Our anger and temperament – whose fault ?

Generally the reason for anger is out of control. Being insensitive, self centred, egoist with hot temper only add tensions to the loved ones. No point being down in the dumps. When you are dumped, climb out of blues and rise above.
Normally we like to be in control. But when we are angry we lose our reasoning power, discernible by all. In the process we lose our humanity and kindness. We can do things when we are angry that we would shudder in normal circumstances.
We kick, we bite, we snarl. We hammer, we can destroy too. Anger brings cruelty and kills all that is soft and tender. This is an experience common to us all. Why make ourself expend so much energy as well as spoil our own balance by getting furious. But we do it, we get angry. At times the stimulus and the response are not in tandem. Those who are the preys of anger also get angry. They can’t tolerate a hit at their prestige and so enemity is created. The fact that one does not want to forgive and forget makes one angry.
We can rationally realize that anger achieves nothing but enemies. But sometimes, expressing your anger is a healthy outlet for all those negative pent up emotions welling up inside you. Why not try to forgive the reason for anger ? Why not let aside our ego ?
Emotions overrule and they surmount logic. We have all experienced this, no doubt. Becoming reasonable and fair can help in curbing anger. If you feel bad tempered, speak your mind to sensible and RELIABLE persons and let them deal with the fall out or argument. Moreover, one should readily accept that as human beings we are all fallible. If one feels that one can make mistakes and it does not need condemnation, then there will be less cause for anger towards oneself.
If one thinks that others can make mistakes and accept them gracefully, then the intensity of anger may be less because tolerance will help in preventing the manifestation of anger. In every field there is competition and this naturally creates ill will or anger especially when defeated.
Nowadays in this mad rush world, many have recourse to deep breathing in order to calm the mind ; and when the mind is calm it is easier to control the mind from a futile expression of anger. Likewise, yoga and meditation allow the mind to be cool and tranquil also and thus prevent undue hassles of anger surging up. We should refrain from taking actions on an immature, inappropriate impulse towards aggressions. Adopting an attitude of taking life as it comes, makes a person more adept at quelling anger. Life is evidently problematic. We should prepare ourselves to deal with them positively. This should be our priority. Ultimately, we should be ready to believe that bad things can happen to all of us at any time.
At times trying to suppress anger may be harmful because a person may seethe and carry the poison within. So it is best not to react at the moment but talk about the cause of anger in a rational and peaceful frame of mind to someone whom you can TRUST. This is a most difficult thing because in moment of crisis, very few or none come to our rescue. Whatever the anger quotient of a human being, anger is a disease that can cause a person to become sick. So it is important that people try to stay aloof from getting bad tempered. If it festers in the heart and mind, one can first calm down and then talk out the person who is the cause of the anger.
It requires a little psychology to appreciate this reality. But how, where and when to find such a good Samaritan ? Who will extend a helping hand ? At one point or another, we all unfortunately have to go through humbling experience of getting dumped. This is the way of life and it is the bitter truth. When we emerge out of this ordeal, it makes us more sensitive individuals. Our objective and ultimate goal is to accept our fate and move on to other endeavours, devoid of anger.
Anger is a terrible emotion causing havoc everywhere and can culminate into a disease at psychological level. It is fear made manifest on the body. We should strive to nip it in the bud by expressing tolerance and patience. As a sage aptly puts it : “A handful of patience is worth more than a bushel of brains”.
Although life is full of dilemmas, paradoxes and contradictions, yet it is also dotted with myriad of blissful experiences. It is up to the individual how to perceive it – just like sunlight is open air to the rich but means hard labour for the poor. We all know that after darkness there is light and cold season is followed by warm season vice versa. Therefore, our lives are punctuated with good and bad episodes. In a rational perspective our sense of maturity and patience is required to curb anger. This is because if it goes unchecked, it can trigger lot of hatred and even lead to disaster. So the solution for all these animosities lies in the fact – Tell only what is necessary to the person one must tell, and only when it must be told.
We are all alike as human beings. We all have our weaknesses and as well as strong points. Let us share our feelings mutually so that we shall not become victims of anger or frustration. In short, we are responsible for our own downfall or victory in the context of anger and temperament. The greatest virtue is to forgive and forget. Then only we can live harmoniously with dignity, respect and confidence in the society.
Together, we can certainly make it, dear friends.

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