The following personal essay and poem are from Ash Phoenix’s new book “Who wants love?”
“Sometimes, we ask ourselves what remains of our lives when we are gone. Was our life worth living? Have we made a mark? Did it make a difference to anyone on this earth that we were here?
The answer is difficult to give. Our lives can create meaning for others and ourselves. 
As parents, we often feel we are here on this earth to be there for our children, to help them grow up and become responsible citizens of this planet. We, however, sooner or later realise that there should be meaning in our lives beyond raising them.
I often ask myself what the other meaningful things in my life are. Teaching my students gives me a sense of purpose. They learn in my lectures not only about the subject, but I also teach them how important it is to have enthusiasm for what they do.
I also have a passion for writing and publishing books and newspaper articles, as they allow my readers to contemplate life.
Many of us have jobs or even hobbies that help us not only feed our families but give us some sense of meaning. We do not have to be teachers, doctors, firemen or farmers to feel our work has a purpose.
The shop assistant who sells newspapers can bring something positive into the life of others, not only because she supports herself and her family but also because she has a smile on her face when she talks to one of her customers.
We do not know if we will save someone today if we smile at them – it is within the universe of possibilities that this one smile changes someone else’s life. When we are angry with people we meet, we also influence their lives, as we do not show love to them at that moment.
At this stage, we can talk about regret. Most of us have regrets about the lives we did not live. Perhaps the only thing we should regret is not having loved enough.
In the end, we all die. That is the simple but often overlooked truth. Life until this endpoint does not need to be spent as happily as possible. Happiness is fleeting and can be gone at any moment. Maybe all that is required is to do some meaningful things in our lives, like the shop assistant who smiles at her customers.
That is why I want to plea to you: do not regret wherever you stand in your life. Even if things are hard, try to give some love to others and give someone that smile today that makes them happy. Try to have hope that things will become better. And have faith that the life you live is the life you are meant to live.”
What remains
Is it important what remains of our lives?
Do we need to leave behind a mark?
Maybe all that counts is the love and gratitude we feel within.
Thank you that I live! Thank you for the blessings.
Let us not take ourselves too seriously!
We are only stardust in the vast universe.
ONLY STARDUST!
On 21st December 2022, Ash Phoenix reads poems from her new book Who wants love? Natalie Desveaux, Mauritian opera singer and 2nd price winner of the Barry Alexander International Vocal Competition in NYC, and the French soprano Agathe Dubourg present beautiful love songs and opera aria, accompanied by the concert pianist Serena Ip. Tickets are available at Otayo.
